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A baby’s first tantrum can take you by surprise. Your baby can really shock you by shrieking, stamping, hitting, or making his whole body go stiff. But don’t take it personally; baby tantrums aren’t about anything you’ve done wrong, and they aren’t really about temper, either—your baby isn’t old enough for that. The ways you’ll respond to your baby’s behavior when he is older are different than how you should respond now.
Why babies have tantrums and what you can do about it
A baby tantrum is an abrupt and sudden loss of emotional control. Various factors bring tantrums on, and if you can identify the trigger, then you can help him calm down æ and perhaps even avoid the tantrum in the first place. Here are the common reasons and ways to solve the problem:
|Reason for tantrum
||Settle baby down to sleep; Provide quiet activity
||Give baby a snack or something to drink
||Help baby achieve his goal or remove the frustration; Use distraction
||Hold and cuddle baby; Remove baby from difficult situation
|Inability to communicate
||Try to figure out what he wants; Calmly encourage him to show you
||Allow a few minutes for baby to make adjustment
||Move baby to a quiet place
How to prevent baby tantrums
Often, you can prevent a baby from losing control of his emotions if you prevent the situations that lead up to this. Here are some things to keep in mind:
- When baby is tired, put him down for a nap or to sleep.
- Feed your baby frequently. Babies have small tummies and need regular nourishment.
- Give your baby toys that are geared to his age and ability level.
- Warn your baby before changing activities (“One more swing, then we’re going home”).
- Be patient when putting your baby in an unfamiliar environment or when introducing him to new people.
- Help your baby learn new skills (such as climbing stairs or working puzzles).
- Keep your expectations realistic; don’t expect more than your baby is capable of.
- As much as possible, keep a regular and predictable schedule. • When your baby is overly emotional, keep yourself as calm as possible.
- Use a soothing tone of voice and gentle touch to help your baby calm down. He can’t do it on his own, he needs your help.
By Elizabeth Pantley, Author of Gentle Baby Care.
Excerpted with permission by McGraw-Hill/Contemporary Publishing from The No-Cry Sleep Solution: Gentle Ways to Help Your Baby Sleep Through the Night by Elizabeth Pantley, © 2002 Website: www.pantley.com/elizabeth
About the Author:
Parenting educator Elizabeth Pantley is president of Better Beginnings, Inc., a family resource and education company. Elizabeth frequently speaks to parents at schools, hospitals, and parent groups around the world. Her presentations are received with enthusiasm, and praised as realistic, warm and helpful.
She is a regular radio show guest and frequently quoted as a parenting expert in newspapers and magazines such as Parents, Parenting, American Baby, Woman's Day, Good Housekeeping, and Redbook and on hundreds of parent-directed Web sites. She publishes a newsletter, Parent Tips, which is distributed in schools nationwide.
Elizabeth is the author of eight popular parenting books, available in 18 languages, and she was a contributing author to The Successful Child with Dr. William and Martha Sears.
Elizabeth and her husband, Robert live in the state of Washington, along with their four children, Angela, Vanessa, David, and Coleton, and "Grama." Elizabeth is an involved participant in her children's school and sports activities and has served in positions as varied as softball coach and school PTA president.
This article appeared in Pathways to Family Wellness magazine, Issue #04.
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